One of 'those' mornings...
Well, I had ‘one of those mornings’ this morning. And I’m going to blog about it to (a) find the funny in it, and (b) because Love Island’s not on on a Saturday so what else am I supposed to do?! (I think watching Love Island actually counts as a hobby. Husband is instead unwinding this eve by watching some bloke do his gym routine on TV. Captivating.)
Anyway- this morning. Tot (23 months) and Babe (4 months) were both a bit whiny-tired from feeling a bit under the weather with head colds. My husband was at work. So it was always going to be one of those ‘they'll brighten up after a good nap’ days.
However, as the morning unravelled, a few incidents occurred...
Firstly, there was a SPIDER in my BRA! I kept moving around my top hangy bits (you know which bits I mean?) thinking that they were a bit itchy! But then something felt crawly in my bra and I took a look and lo and behold there was an ACTUAL SPIDER!! I ousted him out frantically and called out in a low, grossed-out tone: “EUGGHHH!”
Tot came over to see what all the fuss was about (oh- and I took a pic so I could inform the family of the incident via whatsapp #standard.)
I didn’t want to alarm Tot, so where I had flung old Spid on to the floor I thought I’d make a point of showing her.
“Look! A spider!” I said in a jovial tone. “Say hello!” (yeah...I know...now I talk to spiders- which isn’t actually that weird because we’ve also reached the phase with Tot where we have to say “bye” to everything. “Bye bath. Bye apples. Bye phone-charger-wire-that-I-don't-know-why-you’ve-got?!”)
Tot said “hello” to the spider. She then performed one quick, fell swoop and finger-prodded Spid!
That was it. Finnito. Spid was no more! What a quick spider tragedy!
“Oh dear!” Tot said. “Oh dear,” I repeated, “you'd better put him in the bin!” (don’t know why I assumed Spid was male? Does that make me spider sexist? Hope not.)
Off she toddled, squishy spider in hand. I heard a cupboard open. I heard a saucepan. I heard a cupboard shut. I followed her. I had a look in the cupboard and there was old Spid resting in peace on a saucepan lid!
Life is so strange sometimes...!
Whilst I was about to become a spider-pallbearer, Babe was getting restless on her playmat where she had been during the incident. The thing is, she’s had her first cold and so laying flat to play really did make her sound snuffly.
A Babe with a cold really is a sorry little sight though, isn’t it? And as I picked her up she did the most humongous sneeze which left my arm looking like a slip and slide!
Meanwhile, Tot began collating entirely inappropriate play things. This is what she selected:
Arg. 'Chasing my tail' sprang to mind! I needed a new plan: a walk in the pushchair to get them off to sleep at the same time...(haha) and get myself a bit of fresh air!? Yes.
Well...living in a village where there are some really lovely older people means that this doesn’t always go to plan. We were accosted three times by older people wanting to chat and ‘have a look at the babies.’ This is usually welcome and lovely- just not when trying to get tired children off to sleep! However, after one sweet gent had strangely asked if they were twins (I mean- look at them- one’s nearly two and one was in utero less than 5 months ago?!?!) I decided to head back home.
To cut a long story short (ish?) they didn’t fall asleep until lunchtime when we headed out in the car, and the rest of the morning was therefore spent washing half of dishes in between sporadic reading of a book about a mole getting poo on his head. Of course.
But all in all, it was just ‘one of those mornings’ (in any walk of life you get a few dodgy ones, right? Even if that does involve spiders in your bra; snot up your sleeve; and stories about pooheads.) And I wouldn’t change it for the world!
